i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
Youβre so close!!!
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
