He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize