she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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