We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize