He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
