But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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