ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize