It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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