Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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