My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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