Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
