Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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