I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
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