I want to have your abortion
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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