I just made out with a guy for $7.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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