This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
