i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
