Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize