he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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