I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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