If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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