and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
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