Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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