Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
