Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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