Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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