butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize