Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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