the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
