You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Blood and glitter go together right?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
