Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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