Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
