PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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