Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
