just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
