i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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