it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
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