Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Did you pee in the oven last night??
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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