yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
