batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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