then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
