the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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