did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
