He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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