There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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