I have demons in me.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Quick, to the slutcave!
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
