The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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