im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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