Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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