butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
