Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
The struggles of a small town man whore
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize